The Bella Beast has the loudest voice in our house. The most piercing scream. The strongest protesting wail. And everything must be announced at maximum decibels volume, with double exclamation marks.
“Jade, I want to play XBox!!”
Several minutes later, “Zachie, stand still so I can shoot you!!” then “Mum, he’s not letting me kill him. Tell him to get off the Xbox!!”
Even expressions of love are yelled loud enough for the neighbors to hear. “Dada, I love you. You’re my bestest favorite!!”
We have all been trying (unsuccesfully) to get this child to speak quieter. Yell softer. Protest gentler. Even love nicer. To no avail. I confess, I’ve started to yell. So she will get the message and stop yelling? Umm, not very clever of me…Her loudness has been driving us all nuts.
And then today she comes home with a form from the Hearing Test Nurses that visited her preschool. My Bella Beast has failed the hearing test. Her ears only have 30% hearing because they’re jam packed with nastiness and need to be cleaned out. The Hot Man asked me, “Haven’t you been cleaning her ears? Didn’t you notice anything?!” The he rushed off to take her to the doctor right away.
It’s all clear to me now. I can hear the music. No wonder she talks so loud all the time. The poor child can’t hear properly. And there I was snapping at her to ‘be quiet, stop shouting!’
Everybody chant with me now. Bad mother. Bad mother. Bad mother.