We love to tell people we havent seen for awhile –
“Oka! Ua e lapoa!”… “Ohmiheck you’re so fat!”
We especially love to say this to our relatives who are skinnier than we are.
Shut your eyes and visualize it. A really REALLY large Samoan woman, several times larger than you, hugging you, suffocating you with her over-abundance while exclaiming very loudly, “Talofa’e. What happened to you?! You so fat!” And you have to grin and bear it because she’s your auntie and all your extended family are looking on. Nodding their heads in agreement at your fatness.