children, marriage, relationships, the Hot Man, youth

I Hate the Hot Man.

Life’s just not fair. This is the Hot Man EIGHTEEN years ago. (With a mildly attractive young woman at his side.)

And this is the Hot Man NOW. Is it just me – or does this man look pretty much the same? Hello? Did we not live through the same number of years over the last two decades?!

The mildly attractive woman is missing from the picture because she aint even MILDLY attractive anymore. Thank you very much to – five children, gravity, three c-sections, donuts, demanding toddlers, clingy pre-schoolers, smartass teenagers, stress, wear and tear, the Y2K bug, that one disastrous experiment with chemical hair straightener, the greenhouse effect, global warming, more donuts, sleepless nites, exercise procrastination, inflation, acid rain, the cancellation of Brothers and Sisters, an excessive amount of baking, abs that seem to have lost their elastic, deforestation, pollution and soil erosion in the Kalahari Desert. This list does not even begin to fully encompass the causes of the mildly attractive woman’s decay and decomposition. Needless to say, there is incredible injustice at work here. Why is the Hot Man so ‘well-preserved’?

He’s too hot-skinned to be a vampire. Maybe he secretly belongs to the Wolf pack?

Either way, I hate him. It’s just not fair.

18 thoughts on “I Hate the Hot Man.”

  1. you are soooo funny. I'm sure you are still hot stuff yourself.. but yeah, men do tend to preserve better than us.also, I think you are right.. he is definitely in the Wolf pack, LOL

  2. OMGGGGGG!! ahahahhaa lani u are waaaaaaaaaaaay to hard on urself sister!! seriously?? ask him and he will tell u what we see,how incredibly beautiful talented and gifted you are.now snap outa it shesh!! lol!!

  3. I feel your pain….. πŸ™‚ Let them have the baby, have the c-section, worry about the scale, and still balance life while balancing your check book. Ode' to US… πŸ™‚ lol

  4. LOL Lani you're hilarious !!!! Oh please you're still super hot (that was said in the most non-gayest way possible lmao)

  5. Yes, Wolfpack. LOL. they preserve better and another thing that drives me nuts? How quickly he can get fit and in shape. Way faster than me. We start off our fitness goals TOGETHER and then BAM he's way ahead of me. More unfairness.

  6. Aww thank you – this blogpost was in response to the Hot Man complaining about all the men on this blog. Who are not him. So heres a blogpost DEDICATED to the Hottest Man in my universe. Yay!

  7. OMG maybe hes like part of daniels vasaloa!!! gosh **DAYDREAM** he is secretly a telesa- and like member they dont age as fast as norms!! omg i just scared myself lol. PS your wonderful and gorgeous!! and besides you ARE TOTALLY A BOSSwoman!!thats what beyonce says "Who Runs The World? GIRLS"*Hugs&&MWxxxxAH

  8. Oh girl…I feel your pain!! My husband looks exactly the same today as the day we started dating nearly 15 years ago!! But unlike you, I can't even blame kids for my body now!!! Why does it seem like men have it easier?? lol!

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