birth control, children, parenting, sleepless in samoa

The Problem with Birth Control.

I am one of six children. When I was a self-obsessed teenager and sick to bits of my younger siblings, I asked my mum one day – “Why didnt you stop having babies after me?”

She must have been having a rough day. Because she snarled,
I did.”


That one was a broken condom. That one was the Pill. And that one? Was just a moment of insanity.


And that, my sleepless friends, was the one and ONLY time my mother talked to me about sex. Or birth control. (It was also a very telling insight into the abundant joys of motherhood…)

So tell me – did YOUR parents ever talk to you about the facts of life?

9 thoughts on “The Problem with Birth Control.”

  1. hahaha….yea right! I got a stern- "you'd better not even think about getting pregnant!" after I think begging to go out to a social one night…that was it!! haha…

  2. I was just thinking about (but really dreading) the day that I would have to talk to my kids about the facts of life. When I thought back to my own childhood/teenage years and finding out about the birds and bees – I had to read books (I mean textbooks!)to find out about periods etc… lol My mother has never spoken to me about the facts of life right up to this day except once (when I was a teenager)to say that if I got pregnant i would get strung up on the tallest tree behind our house. Now that was the most effective birth control talk I have ever had lol…

  3. Yikes, I can just imagine your face after her answer!I'm cringing now just remembering my mum's chat with me about sex and such. Eeeeeeee…

  4. Yes Talli – it was defn one of those…"oh heck I wish I hadnt asked this…i think my mum has lost it" – moments! As to your own cringing moment – you're lucky you parents actually talked to you about it! I think I can safely speak for ALOT of Samoans/Pacific Islanders when I say, that usually our parents just told us something along the lines of…"Be a good girl/boy. Or else!)

  5. Studymum – YOUR mother-daughter talk sounds more like what most of us got when we were little! LOL. Like you, I resolved to be better about this issue with my own children. And it has been an interesting journey let me tell you…I wanted my children to be confident and informed about their bodies etc and not be ashamed or uncomfortable about the topic – which first required that I their mother, be confident and cool about discussing it! LOL Im still learning…

  6. Moi – like thats what we were planning to ay?! Reminds me of when a boy asked me to be his date to Homecoming when we moved to the USA. My dad gave me a 2 hour lecture about how i was too young to get married…and Americans were 'different' from us and i should be focusing on schoolwork. Hello, i just want to go to a dance! I think what my dad was trying to tell me in a very roundabout way was…American boys are way bad-der than Samoan ones and i shouldnt have sex. (well, thats my translation of his chat anyway!)

  7. My mother NEVER talked to me about sex….I don't think she was too worried about it, as I was not interested in boys (or more like they weren't interested in me bahaha) till I was over 21. Then I got pregnant and she wouldn't stop berating me for having "sex before marriage"…well a little too late for that hehe. So my plan is to speak freely with my daughters about it so they are aware…rather than have them sneak behind my back if u know what I mean.

  8. I 100% agree Coconut Girl. But heres a tough question for you – when your daughters become teenagers and 'interested' in boys – will you give them a box of condoms? Offer to help get them the Pill? aaaargh.

  9. My mother only strayed near the subject when I was 18 and my 16-yr-old sister got pregnant. She looked at me and said, "You know, I was actually expecting you to get pregnant." Whaaaat???!! I never understood that comment, and to this day do not have the gall to ask her.I plan to do better with Lyla…we'll see how you guys go first aye. Lol!

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