Can you read this chart? U cant? You IDIOT!I took the Beast to the doctor because she had a gooey eye. The doctor was young. VERY young. She looked at the Beast's eye thoughtfully, hmmm. Up until that point I hadn't been worried. My kid had a gooey eye. She needed some antibiotic drops and… Continue reading Gooey Eyes and Really Dumb Doctors
Category: parenting
The Gift of Two Mothers
I was blessed to have two very different mothers when I was growing up. (and no, I don’t mean my mum had a multiple personality disorder. I really don’t mean that at all. Really.) First there was my mum. The Pacific's version of Martha Stewart. And then there was Peka – our babysitter/ Nanny/ housekeeper.… Continue reading The Gift of Two Mothers
The Curse of Daughters
May you grow up and have a daughter who is as horrible as you! Ha ha ha!"She makes me so mad that I just want to tear her face into little bitty pieces like a tissue." A while back, this is what a dear friend said to me about her teenage daughter, as she vented… Continue reading The Curse of Daughters
How to Teach your Children about Profanity.
What words are in YOUR rubbish bin?My little sister has noticed that I'm swearing alot on my blog. The BEEP BEEP words have been steadily increasing and she's a little concerned...I didnt know this, so i went right away and did a quick scan. Ouch. She's right. A lot more nasty language has been creeping… Continue reading How to Teach your Children about Profanity.
How to Raise a Multi-Lingual Child. (Yeah right)
I am raising a multi-lingual child. The 3yr old Beast is speaking English. (Thank you me.) Spanish. (Thank you Dora.) And now Maori - thanks to her preschool. Today she asked me (with an annoyed expression on her face) "Mama, why you speaking English?""Umm because that's the language that we speak.""No, we have to talk… Continue reading How to Raise a Multi-Lingual Child. (Yeah right)
I’m Seeing Red.
Sometimes I feel like the (fat) Little Red Hen doing all the work to make bread while lazy bums do nuthin but gather around when the food is ready. Which is SUCH an unexciting, uncool fairytale character to feel like. I wish I could say I felt like the sexy version of Little Red Riding… Continue reading I’m Seeing Red.
That’s Delicious
The theme for this week's selection of blogs that I stalk...is FOOD, GLORIOUS FOOD. Hmmm... If you read my blog then you know that I love to bake stuff. I suck at regular cooking of regular food but I'm kinda kickass when it comes to baking. Especially desserts. This is of course, because that's what… Continue reading That’s Delicious
Notes from the Edge of Reason
She's driving me nuts. I need help.Dear Diet Coke, You're killing me. Painfully yours, Lani's Kidneys.Dear Racy Lacy Sexy Lingerie from 'Deliciously Exciting Lani's drawer,We really miss you. All this life-sucking control top, boring 100%cotton stuff does nothing for us. Please come back. Bring deliciously exciting sex with you.Wistfully, breathily ( and over abundantly) yours,Lani's… Continue reading Notes from the Edge of Reason
We need YOU!
WANTEDA friend for our mother. Because then she won't have so much time to spend obsessing about US and OUR friends. You must -*Prefer communicating via Twitter, email and text. Too much human-to-human interaction makes our mum tired. Induces feelings of suffocation and paranoid cage-fighter behaviour. Plan on hanging out in person, oh..maybe twice a… Continue reading We need YOU!
That’s Rubbish.
Snuggly Teddy bears of Love everywhere. Happy happy happy, joy joy joy!"When I grow up, I want to be the person who picks up rubbish along the road." Announced the Princess.We are driving down the road, just me and her. Her lifegoal catches me off guard. "Umm, okay. Why?""Because there's so much rubbish everywhere. Look… Continue reading That’s Rubbish.
Lani Wendt Young 